234

With approximately 234 days left in this little adventure, otherwise known as being 6w3d pregnant (really? I'm still blown away that I get to use that word), I am thinking about a few things.

The first is that while I know that abdominal twinges and cramping are normal, I hate each and every one.

The second is that the world(?)-famous nausea-curing wonder-beverage Ginger Ale is my intestines' worst enemy, which is unfortunate for ye olde tummy...

Which leads me to my third thing. It's going to be a dang hard project to keep this a secret as I spend most (yes, most) of my waking hours tinged an elegant, no, delicate, shade of green. Very Eastery, really. Very season-appropriate and festive. But noticeable, ya know?

Which leads me to my fourth thing. I now understand what "cravings" are and I believe that that word is utterly inappropriate. You crave water on a hot day. You crave chocolate when you're sad or pissy. This is not that. This is being starving and being unable to eat anything but maybe, just maybe... ahhhhh, blueberries! And so, blueberries must be eaten. Because if you don't eat, you'll die. And if you eat anything else, it'll get stuck in your throat. If you're lucky.

I'm learning things. And I'm so dang thankful for all this misery it's ridiculous.

Which leads me to my fifth thing. Thankfulness. Only a few of my friends at work know "the news" and apparently two were discussing it amongst themselves. One passed on to me what the other said. Apparently there were happy tears involved (happy tears for me? It's so amazing I feel like I could just puff up and float away) and one said, "It's been such a long time, but it was bound to happen. All those prayers had to have been going somewhere."

Now, there are bits of that statement that I don't know how to speak to. I don't know how to match up specific prayers with specific events in the world. I don't know how to say why now, why not before, why not later, why me, why not someone else. All those "whys" are just so far beyond me.

But I do know that God hears all prayers.
And I know that He is the giver of all good things.
And I know that all He gives is good.
And I know that these people in my life are gifts. Good gifts.
And this little pea-sized life wreaking havoc on "our" body is a good gift.
And regardless of the specific communication cause and effect, I know where all these things come from.

And I want to stand out under a starry sky and shout "THANK YOU" til my throat is sore.

And while I'm hormonal and sappy, I just wanna say to all 5 of you readers, that I'm thankful, so very much, for you too.