Christmas list...

Now would be the time to start working on my Christmas list for next year.

Let's see...

Ten fingers
Ten toes
hundreds of diapers a day
sleepless nights

*shake*

Wasn't going to do that. But GOOD LORD A'MIGHTY, is EVERYONE in the WORLD having a baby in the next 6 months?!? Little baby boys and girls are popping out everywhere. Someone save me. I've heard FOUR pregnancy or gender announcements since I woke up this morning. Someone send me chocolate, a good book, and a warm blanket. (Thank goodness I already have all of the above. Brand new tea, peppermint bark, the Harry Potter series - my first time through, several blankets, and a roaring fire.) But really. Someone save me from my procreating graduating class.

I was thinking, rather sanely, this morning, about how amazing the body is. I mean, it's frustrating as all hell. That's been rubbed in our faces several times over by now. But as I feel my body rev up to end another cycle, I'm impressed at all the things it does all by itself. It's a good thing this doesn't strike me often. It would be wearying to walk around in a prolonged state of shock and wonder because, "OH MY GOSH, I"m DIGESTING again." But really. We call our bodies "ours" and yet we were deposited into them without even the slightest consultation and will be evicted from them at a time, place and in a way we usually do not get to choose. And they do things all by themselves, without our explicit direction! Like today, I feel something building in my abdomen - a growing pressure, like a fist. The girls are starting to complain about the hormone dump. The precursors to cramping. Hunger. Feeling tired. I think I'm still a good 4 days away at least, but it's interesting to watch the process in a detached way. For the last year, I was so emotionally invested in the goings-on of my plumbing, and I know I utterly exhausted myself. The complete crash I experienced 4 weeks ago I think was helpful, because now I feel I'm 100 yards away, watching it happen. It's happening to a body that is mine, but it's not all that is me. My soul won't bleed this time. I hope.